I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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