At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not boning my boss.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize