quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
We have so much sex to catch up on
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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