Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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