He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I still have a little drunk in my system
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
