Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
