scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
