So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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