? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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