you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
