This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize