one two three fourrrrnication!
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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