38 yer olds are good kisserssss
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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