grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
