Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
