I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I am one with the molecules
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize