Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
