At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
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Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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