At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize