im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
