he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
PANTIES FOUND
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
