Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
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