and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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