Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
only if we run a train.
done.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
