dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
