Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
