the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize