every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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