i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
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