so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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