Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize