I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat