Just cropdusted the office
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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