I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I'm at about main and main street
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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