your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
