He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
