Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize