I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Randomize