we're blogging at a bar
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
