i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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