This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
