Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
