Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
It all started with a game of naked twister.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
