There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I feel like a drive thru vagina