My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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