the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
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