FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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