Just fell off a train. Bad.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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