worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
