New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
